Me vs the Squirrels – Troubleshooting 3

Cute Squirrel  creative commons by Genista

Original Post  Jul 28, 2009

Squirrels are cute. There’s no doubt about it. However, I can tell you honestly I’m not being paranoid but they are out to get me. It happens every spring and summer– they just can’t get enough of me. They root through all my flower boxes, dig out my plants, and this year they even overturn whole boxes of dirt and fill my decks. What do I do? Run off to buy critter ridder an expensive brand of spices that they aren’t supposed to like. Maybe it works for a minute and then they are back to their old tricks. So this time I tried blood meal and that must have been the final straw because now they’ve decided to get me where it hurts- technology. In the past month they’ve taken my phone line down twice-yup they’re out to get me!

But if you ask me who I dislike more squirrels or call centre people, I think I’m going to have to side with the squirrels. I know that the squirrels cause the problem, but at least they seem earnest.

The problem starts with what sounds like a little static on the phone line; it gets progressively worse and then it’s almost impossible to hear anything. That’s what happened two days ago. I’m a subscriber to Bell Canada, so I know the routine. First you have to check that it’s not an inside the house problem or they charge you $70. To do that you have to disconnect all your phones and then choose a wired line that you know works and plug that into the jack that enters your house first. If there’s still a problem, you are off the hook for paying.

It's the Call Centre in Whoknowswhere! (creative commons brycel)

Next step is trying to get through on the phone. It takes a long time to get through, but the best bet with the voice commands is just to say “talk to a real person.” Then you wait and wait and wait all the while you are forced to listen to loud annoying music interrupted by a guy who keeps coming on and saying how important you are. By the time you get through, you are really annoyed especially when there is so much static on the line and the guy asks you, “What seems to be the problem?” Honestly that’s what he said!!!

As we’ve seen in our reading, sometimes it’s 100% script.

Then it’s sit and wait until the next day for the repair person. In my saga, things went from bad to worse. After awhile I had no dial tone. But I did make an inadvertent discovery. I decided to see what happened when I called my home phone, so I called my line with my cell, and lo and behold it rang. Suddenly I was back to having a static line. So I’ve discovered that the slight power surge brings it back on even if it’s only for awhile.

So now it’s the next day and the repair person is supposed to be here before noon, but of course that doesn’t happen. I have to call my favourite call centre again and ask, ” Is someone really, honestly, truly coming?” Excuses, excuses- yes he’ll be there before 5 pm.  When the poor repair guy gets to my house, I tell him I’m two seconds away from dumping Bell. He has a look that almost says, “Not a bad idea!” but the words that come out of his mouth after me explaining about the last squirrel phone line attack, are “Well you know there are a lot of wires up there, they might have eaten another one all together. Yes the squirrels are nasty.” I mention my discovery to jump start the line, and  he tells me that yes that’s exactly what happens when you phone your line. I’m at least starting to feel better because I’ve learned something. I can see him going up the pole and shortly I get a call and he tells me the damage has been fixed and I can hear him clearly.

Squirrel calling! (photo creative commons kthypryn)

My only fear?   Next call is from this guy—->

Analysis
 
Description of the problem/context:
Static on my phone line and sometimes no dial tone.

Possible causes: Bad phone, rain storm damage or squirrels.

Possible Solutions: Check phones, call repair. Switch phone service to cable.

Action Taken: Unplug all phones, plug in wired phone to first jack that enters the house. It’s not an inside problem. Phone line dead- phone the land line with cell phone. Wait for a man who climbs a pole!

Reflection: Squirrels don’t like me but I can’t do much about that unless I switch to a cable phone. I learned something the repair people don’t tell you. You can spike your dead phone line sometimes by giving it a call. When they finally arrive, there’s nothing quite so nice as the people who can actually fix things!